Legalectric

(Really, it isn’t just that I’ve got this huge Discovery project to get done, or that there’s nothing to blog about, it’s not avoidance of the real, but I just don’t get it — it’s unavoidable marvel at the unreal)

Yes, I admitted freely that I thought a 4th Monday discussion about School Food was a big yawn, IN MY VIEW, that is… not something that I give the proverbial rodent’s rump about. But I trust that Kiffi, one of my favorite “Monday Go To Meeting” people, put together an excellent program!

Stolen from Northfield LWV site!

And I readily admit that I repeatedly gave Bongard rations of bovine excrement about his box of Little Debbies behind the seat of his long nose KW!

And YES, I did scoff at Julie Risser’s comment that criticizing treats at school is a very gutsy thing to do, and still yawn to think about it. But her letter did make “Letter of the Day at the STrib” (and we’ll see if the print the bitch queens in the State of the Union comments).

But … but… but… OK, OK, I admit it, I WAS WRONG!!! I must truly admit I am shocked and shaking my head at the bizarre off the wall response to Julie’s LTE. All this about donuts? Ho-Ho’s of the refined sugar variety? Why would someone get so wound up about this topic? I must also admit I’m no pop-culture maven, but this is a psychosis I do not understand, I cannot comprehend.

Here’s the worst, from, duh, THE KOOL AID REPORT:

Hello Government? Would you be my kidsâ?? parent?

Our kids are getting fat and contracting diabetes from the birthday treats their classmates distribute at school and the State should do ban the practice.

That is the conclusion of a heavily deluded woman by the name of Julie Risser of Edina.

A few excerpts:

Here’s hoping candidates for public office consider the costly and lethal fallout from diabetes stated in your Jan. 17 editorial; here’s hoping they get the need to “insist on habit-changing help from every public and private enterprise that can give it.”

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have state policy that encouraged parents to drop the birthday treats and have children bring in their favorite book instead?

We could promote a love of literacy instead of contributing to a costly epidemic. It seems so logical; after all, education frequently competes for health care dollars.

My turn but, first, a question:

If kids have been bringing Tootsie Pops and cookies to school for years to celebrate their birthdays, why is it the problem of obesity and diabetes is a recent phenomenon?

Could it be because parents such as Julie Risser of Edina allow her children to sit on their asses playing video games for hours on end only to be followed by frying their brains on worthless television programs after dinner â?? which probably consists of high fat, low nutrition crap picked up at a drive through window because Julie and her overachieving husband both work full time to afford the mortgage on the larger-than-necessary-house and the toys needed to keep up appearances and therefore donâ??t have the time to cook a proper dinner for their ever-expanding children.

Or maybe itâ??s because Julie Risser and her overachieving husband ply their children with treats bathed in high fructose corn syrup to keep them happy and to assuage the guilt they suffer for having put the tykes into a kiddy mill â?? aka daycare center â?? so mommy could work full-time rather than raise their own kids.

Hereâ??s my suggestion â?? grab your fat-assed kid by the ear and shove him/her into the yard. Force them to actually run and play. Make the little urchin break a sweat. Running in a video game is not the same.

And for Godâ??s sake, raise your own damned kids. Stop looking to the government to act as the parent you wonâ??t be. Stop abdicating the responsibility you and your husband took on when he knocked you up.

Whatâ??s next, a government supplied monitor to hover over Johnny and Susie to make sure they do their homework. Lord knows it would free up more time you can spend â??finding yourself.â?:

Am I missing something here? Seems like some virulent pathology to me! WTF! Have another “fat pill.”

Below: Your brain on doughnuts